ok. its gonna be quite a long post today. so please go to the toilet first before you pee in front of your com. =DDhappy 1year and 1 month darling! love you so much. here is a very touching story i read when i was surfing my gprs last night and i cried alot because of it. here goes:
When You Divorce Me, Carry Me Out in Your Arms
On my wedding day, I carried my wife in my arms.The bridal car stopped in front of our one-room flat. My buddies insisted that I carry her out of the car in my arms. So I carried her into our home. She was then plump and shy. I was a strong and happy bridegroom.
This was the scene ten years ago.
The following days were as simple as a cup of pure water: we had a kid; I went into business and tried to make more money.When the assets were steadily increasing, the affection between us seemed to ebb. She was a civil servant. Every morning we left home together and got home almost at the same time. Our kid was studying in a boarding school.
Our marriage life seemed to be enviably happy. But the calm life was more likely to be affected by unpredictable changes.
Dew came into my life.
It was a sunny day. I stood on a spacious balcony. Dew hugged me from behind. My heart once again was immersed in her stream of love. This was theapartment I bought for her.
Dew said, you are the kind of man who best draws girls' eyeballs. Her words suddenly reminded me of my wife. When we were just married, my wife said,Men like you, once successful, will be very attractive to girls.
Thinking of this, I became somewhat hesitant. I knew I had betrayed my wife.But I couldn't help doing so.I moved Dew's hands aside and said you go to select some furniture, O.K.?I've got something to do in the company. Obviously she was unhappy, because I had promised to do it together with her. At the moment, the idea of divorce became clearer in my mind although it used to be something impossible to me. However, I found it rather difficult to tell my wife about it. No matter how mildly I mentioned it to her, she would be deeply hurt.
Honestly, she was a good wife. Every evening she was busy preparing dinner.I was sitting in front of the TV. The dinner was ready soon. Then we watched TV together. Or, I was lounging before the computer, visualizing Dew's body. This was the means of my entertainment.
One day I said to her in a slightly joking way, suppose we divorce, what will you do? She stared at me for a few seconds without a word. Apparently she believed that divorce was something too far away from her. I couldn't imagine how she would react once she got to know I was serious.
When my wife went to my office, Dew had just stepped out. Almost all the staff looked at my wife with a sympathetic eye and tried to hide something while talking to her. She seemed to have got some hint. She gently smiled at my subordinates. But I read some hurt in her eyes.
Once again, Dew said to me, He Ning, divorce her, O.K.? Then we live together. I nodded. I knew I could not hesitate any more.
When my wife served the last dish, I held her hand. I've got something to tell you, I said. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the serious topic calmly.
She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?I'm serious. I avoided her question. This so-called answer made her angry.She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man!
That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer, because my heart had gone to Dew.
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glancedat it and then tore it into pieces. I felt a pain inmy heart. The woman who had been living ten years with me would become a stranger one day. But I could not take back what I had said.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer.
Late that night, I came back home after entertaining my clients. I saw her writing something at the table. I fall asleep fast. When I woke up, I found she was still there. I turned over and was asleep again.
She brought up her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but I was supposed to give her one month s time before divorce, and in the month's time we must live as normal a life as possible. Her reason was simple: our son would finish his summer vacation a month later and she didn't want him to see our marriage was broken.
She passed me the agreement she drafted, and then asked me, He Ning, do you still remember how I entered our bridal room on the wedding day? This question suddenly brought back all those wonderful memories to me. I nodded and said, I remember. You carried me in your arms, she continued, so, I have a requirement, that is, you carry me out in your arms on the day when we divorce. From now to the end of this month, you must carry me out from the bedroom to the door every morning.
I accepted with a smile. I knew she missed those sweet days and wished to end her marriage romantically.
I told Dew about my wife s divorce conditions. She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she does, she has to face the result of divorce, she said scornfully. Her words more or less made me feel uncomfortable.
My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. We even treated each other as a stranger. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly, Let us start from today, don't tell our son. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for a bus, I drove to the office.
On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. We were so close that I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this intimate woman carefully for a long time. I found she was not young any more. There were some fine wrinkles on her face.
On the third day, she whispered to me, the outside garden is being demolished. Be careful when you pass there
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I seemed to feel that we were still an intimate couple and I was holding my sweetheart in my arms. The visualization of Dew became vague.
On the fifth and sixth day, she kept reminding me something, such as, where she put the ironed shirts, I should be careful while cooking, etc. I nodded. The sense of intimacy was even stronger. I didn't tell Dew about this.
I felt it was easier to carry her. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. I said to her, It seems not difficult to carry you now. She was picking her dresses. I was waiting to carry her out. She tried quite a few but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I smiled. But I suddenly realized that it was because she was thinner that I could carry her more easily, not because I was stronger. I knew she had buried all the bitterness in her heart. Again, I felt a sense of pain. Subconsciously I reached out a hand to touch her head.
Our son came in at the moment. Dad, it's time to carry mum out. He said. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had been an essential part of his life. She gestured our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face because I was afraid I would change my mind at the last minute. I held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly, as if we came back to our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad.
On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Ourson had gone to school. She said, actually I hope you will hold me in your arms until we are old.
I held her tightly and said, both you and I didn't notice that our life lacked intimacy.
I jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my decision. I walkedupstairs. Dew opened the door. I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I won't divorce. I'm serious.
She looked at me, astonished. The she touched my forehead. You got no fever. She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I can only say sorry to you, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of life, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I understand that since I carried her into the home, she gave birth to our child, I am supposed to hold her until I am old. So I have to say sorry to you.
Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove to the office
When I passed the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet for my wife which was her favorite. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until we are old.
The End.
omg. no matter how many times i read, i will still cry. i let darling read this morning. then his eyes like watery like that lor. what a touching story. * sobs
anyway. went to withdrow my money and finally! made my atm card liao! haha. so happy lar. then went to hunt for my ice cream. but cannot find at holland v leh. so bo bian. i dont wanna waste any more time cause i scared the staff clinic de people have to go lunch liao ma. so we rushed there instead lor.
piang eh. i think the doc dunno how inject man. already said its subcu lor. then made me have the feeling that it was intramas. -.- DOTS. noob doctor. never mind about that! something made me happy lar.
I FOUND MY ICE CREAM! at nuh de 7-11 lor. then i bought it lor. actually its not an ice cream lar. but its like konnyaku jelly laidat. it just wont melt lor. so nice! and it just cost me a mere 60cents. haha. i forgot to send the photo in lar. so next time then i let you all see. the ice cream is called tongue by Wall's. haha. darling like it quite alot. =DD
after that went to axa insurance there lor. on the way, there's this stupid driver, whom i think he is osama's ghinnah, went to get his car from his velvet parking lar. that, i dont mind lar. but drive halfway not even 3 metres, he stopped again. to let his wife( i guess) to board the car. eh. why cant the wife follow you get the car har? why make your life, AND the cars BEHIND you so difficult ar? then never mind lor. then trying to act xia lan leh. sudden brake somemore leh. but too bad i forgot to take down his car plate. ( you're just a lucky asshole.) anyway it's just an off-peak car. nothing big deal as if its a lambourgini.
KNS.
then we went suntec lor. then treat darling ben and jerry's! woohoo! but actually i ate everything myself lar. didnt really wanna share with him. hahahahhaha! walked all the way to marina square lor. really nothing to do lar. so we went to mac and rot lor. read my mag read until i fell asleep. so we walked slowly back to suntec to get his car lor.
sometimes. i really wonder. are taxis the king of the road har? why har? they themselves stop at the middle of the road can leh. like us, mormal cars we stop ar, they press their fucking horn de leh. WHY HAR? and one thing. they like to SPEED. i know lar. diesel very cheap. no need to waste like this what. and another thing you notice, they dont stop driving unless there's a traffic light( but most of them will chiong all the way without getting caught by the police which makes me think they are NUTS.), or there's a passenger flagging for them.
piang eh. then the snobbish looks on their faces. KNS. so what lar? its just a CAB what. its not your car what. you rented it, you use the money you earn from the passenger to pay what. so, whats the big fat deal? you can anyhow chiong the traffic lights, stop anywhere and anytime, block people's car, and do whatever shit. so what? one day you these kinda drivers will get your dessert one. so dont be a snob on the roads.
* grins
darling went to school. i sie and jy went cck lor. haha. but sie took lrt lar. so i take bus alone lor.
so. went to darling's home to check if he got receive any letters lor. alas! he finally received 1 of the things he ordered online. rich guy yea? haha. just a stupid piece of sticker. -.- then he slept all the way lor. lucky i asked jessie where she was. and we met up again. ok. story about another road snob.
nearly got into a car crash because of that idiot. you pa jiao is it? cannot see my darling's car in front of you ar? you still must die die squeeze into our space meh? piang eh. still horn somemore? really man. whats wrong with singaporeans driving? then darling told me, " lets be jackass today and block his way!". haha. then we did lar. hahahah. i think that nerdass was so pissed off lor. he deserves it. ((:
whats wrong with uncles? never see girls wearing shorts before meh? please lar. why not go look at your own wives if you're married lor. arbo you go fuck yourself lor. kua si mi lanjiao? see until like that. to hell lar you all tikopeks. knn.
ok lar. i think i stop here. i think you feel like peeing liao. haha.
